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Listening to Fear Quotes
Listening to Fear Quotes

Joyce: Listen you two, I know this creamed spinach is pretty delicious, but I promise, I won't be offended if you go out for some real food.
Buffy: You kidding me? This is the good life. Relaxing in bed while people bring you food on trays.
Dawn: I like the Jello.
Joyce: Help yourself. There's something about food that moves by itself that gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Dawn: It's good and wiggly. This girl at school told me that gelatin is made from ground-up cow's feet, and that if you eat Jello there's some cows out limping with no feet. But I told her I'm sure they kill 'em before they take off their feet. Right?
Buffy: You're the one who insisted on teaching her to talk.

Dr. Kriegel: Well, maybe some good news will help. The blood work's come back from the lab, and everything seems fine. So, we've scheduled your surgery for day after tomorrow at ten in the morning. How's that sound to you?
Joyce: Oh, well, I think they had me scheduled for volleyball, but, ah, we can work around it.

Giles: My god, what a rough night.
Willow: I just did two of 'em! Yay on me! That was pretty cool. Except the part where I was all terrified and... and now my knees are all dizzy.
Xander: Not so much a big success night for me. But I think I should get points just for showing up. Unlike some Riley Finn who shall remain unnamed.
Giles: Yes, that was disappointing. Things would have been easier if he'd been here.
Willow: Oh, piffle, who needs him when I'm dusting two at a ti- Whoops. Maybe it would've been good if ... he'd shown up.

Willow: Care package! Special delivery for the Summers girls. Now, let's see what I have in this sack of mine. Oh, I feel just like Santa Claus, except thinner and younger and female and, well, Jewish.

Willow: Oh, Buffy- I have this for you.
Buffy: Homework? Oh. I don't believe in tiny Jewish Santa any more.
Willow: And a yo-yo.

Crazy Man: What is that thing? There-there's no data. There's no pictures on this one there! What is the data? There's no one in there.
Dawn: Buffy?
Buffy: Come on, honey. Don't worry about it.

Ben: I guess I missed that, was he bothering you?
Buffy: Hey Ben, uh, this is my friend Willow.
Ben: Hi.
Willow: Hi.
Buffy: And, uh, yeah, the crazy man was a little... you know, crazy, but it's okay. Are they really gonna send him home?
Ben: Don't get me started. The mental ward's booked beyond capacity, literally nowhere to put them, so the ones with families, they're letting 'em go home. Like his family's gonna be able to take care of him. He has to have someone to watch him 24-7! What was he saying to you?
Dawn: I-
Buffy: Oh, he was just babbling.

Willow: You know what's weird?
Tara: Japanese commercials are weird.
Willow: Yes. And also, you know some of the stars we're looking at... don't even exist any more? In the time that it takes for their light to reach us, they've died. Exploded. Poof.
Tara: Were, um... were things rough at the hospital?
Willow: You know, I used to love to look up at them when I was little. They're supposed to make you feel all insignificant, but... they made me feel like... like I was in space... part of the stars. There's... Canis Minor... and... and Cassiopeia.
Tara: And the big pineapple.
Willow: Hmm. You know, I'm not sure I remember that one.
Tara: Oh, it's, it's a major one. See those three bright stars right over there?
Willow: Yeah.
Tara: And see those stars along there? That's the bottom of the pineapple.
Willow: It's big.
Tara: Hence the name. The real ones never made sense to me, I... sort of have my own.
Willow: Teach me.
Tara: See those stars over there? 'Short man looking uncomfortable.'
Tara: Uh... 'Moose getting a sponge bath.' Umm... 'little pile o'crackers.' Tha-that was a bit of a stretch. You do it. What would you call... mm, that one?
Willow: Hmm, let's see... a huge flaming meteor about to crash into something!

Joyce: I bet it's not even hooked up to anything. Just like the push buttons at the crosswalk that are supposed to make the signal change.
Buffy: I'm sure someone's on - What, the push buttons aren't hooked up to anything?

Riley: Everyone stay close. I'm glad you called me in on this.
Xander: Glad you answered.
Riley: Oh, yeah. I'm sorry about last time. Heard I missed out on some fun.
Xander: Oh, yeah, fun was had. Also frolic, merriment, and near-death hijinks.

Riley: It's sort of-
Giles: Hollow.
Riley: Yeah.
Anya: So, uh, we're all thinking the same thing, right?
Xander: Festive pinata? Delicious candy?
Willow: Something evil crashed to earth in this and then broke out and... slithered away to do badness.
Giles: In all fairness, we don't really know about the slithered part.
Anya: Oh, no. I'm sure it frisked about like a fluffy lamb.

Riley: Oh, that might be toxic, don't touch it.
Xander: Oh yeah, touching it was my first impulse. Luckily I've moved on to my second, which involves dry-heaving and running like hell. Oh, man, does that smell.

Joyce: Don't touch me! You - you thing!
Dawn: Mom, please!
Joyce: Get away from me! You're nothing, you're, you're a shadow!
Buffy: Mom-
Joyce: I don't know what you are or how you got here!
Buffy: Mom, it's Dawn.
Joyce: Dawn? Honey, what's wrong?

Dawn: She hates me.
Buffy: No.
Dawn: She called me a thing.
Buffy: She loves you. Okay? She's not herself. I told you what the doctor said about the tumor.
Dawn: No, not just Mom. People. They keep saying weird stuff about me.
Buffy: Are you talking about the man in the hospital?
Dawn: He called me a thing too. And there was another one. Weird guy outside the magic shop. He said I didn't belong. He said I wasn't real. Why does everybody keep doing that? What's wrong with me?
Buffy: Nothing. It's not you. I think there's something that happens in people's brains when there's something wrong. It's, it's like a short-circuit... and it makes them feel like nothing's real except for them. That's all it is. Look, it is not you. Okay? And if anyone says anything like that to you again, don't listen. Even if it's Mom.
Dawn: I hate it.
Buffy: I know. Just don't listen.

Xander: Look at how teeny Mercury is compared to, like, Saturn. Whereas in contrast, the cars of the same name-
Giles: Xander, please, we have work to do here.
Xander: I still don't get why we had to come here to get info about a killer snot monster.
Giles: Because it's a killer snot monster from outer space. I did not say that.

Tara: We've been scouring all the international periodicals for any other meteorite landings in the last week.
Anya: Big zippo.
Giles: Well, then it would appear that the world is not being invaded.
Tara: I'm pretty pleased about that.
Willow: Uh, guys? I've got some stuff. The most recent meteoric anomaly was the Tunguska blast in Russia in 1917. Some witnesses claimed the meteor was hollow.
Xander: Hmm. Maybe with a chewy demon center like ours.
Giles: How far back does this list of anomalies go?
Willow: Pretty far. Back to the Queller impact in the twelfth century.
Tara: The what?
Willow: Queller. I-I don't know why they call it that, it didn't hit a place called Queller or anything. It landed just outside of Reykjavik in Iceland.
Xander: Wait, I just saw... Queller. Quell... here, here! 'Primitive people used to believe that the moon was a cause of insanity. Sometimes they would pray to the moon to send a special meteor to fix the problem the moon had caused. These meteors were expected to quell the madmen.'
Tara: The man in the woods. He was a mental patient.
Xander: And he got pretty well... quelled.
Willow: Okay, I'm looking in history right now. It says in the Middle Ages there were these sweeping plagues of madness. People were losing their marbles everywhere. But then it would suddenly subside. And these dates look pretty close. Like-like maybe it happened after each one of the meteor events.
Giles: So something emerged from the meteors... and quelled the madmen.
Xander: Meteor go boom, crazy guy goes bye-bye.
Tara: Xander's little book made it sound like this Queller thing had to be summoned. So... who summoned it?
Xander: Who else? My money's on Glory, our resident beastie summoner.

Buffy: Spike?
Spike: Yeah. Listen, uh, did you hear a noise?
Buffy: What the hell are you doing in my house?
Spike: Right then, caught me. Your basement's full of junk. And me being in need of, uh, junk...
Buffy: You were stealing?
Spike: Well, yeah. Can't exactly work the counter at Burger Barn, can I?
Buffy: Wait, are those pictures of me?

Dreg: It's strange. A body might ask what exactly it is you think you're doing. He might ask what all this was meant to accomplish. Because to a humble postulant, it looks like chaos. Like unnecessary attention drawn where it ought not to be.
Ben: Get out!
Dreg: Sir. Sir, forgive me. I just want to understand. Why summon the Queller?
Ben: What do you think? Because I'm cleaning up Glory's mess. Just like I've done my whole damn life.

Joyce: Buffy, uh, I'm gonna ask you something, a-and if I'm, if I'm being crazy you just tell me, okay?
Buffy: You got it.
Joyce: The other day... well, actually, I'm, I'm not sure when, the days seem to all bleed together...
Buffy: It's not important.
Joyce: No, I guess it isn't. I do know I was... pretty out of it, and I had... not-not a dream... exactly, more like I had this... knowledge, i-it just came to me like... truth, you know? Even though it didn't seem... possible, even though I shouldn't even think such things."
Buffy: What?
Joyce: That Dawn... she's not... mine, is she?
Buffy: No.
Joyce: She's... she does belong to us, though.
Buffy: Yes, she does.
Joyce: And she's important. To the world. Precious. As precious as you are to me. Then we have to take care of her. Buffy, promise me. If anything happens, if I don't come through this-
Buffy: Mom-
Joyce: No, listen to me. No matter what she is, she still feels like my daughter. I have to know that you'll take care of her, that you'll keep her safe. That you'll love her like I love you.
Buffy: I promise.
Joyce: Good. Good. Oh, my sweet brave Buffy. What would I do without you?

The Usual
The Usual

Random Quotage:

Personal question?
Yeah, shoot!
When Buffy was a vampire, you weren't still, like, attracted to her, were you?
Willow, how can you... I mean, that's really bent! She was... grotesque!
Still dug her, huh?
I'm sick, I need help.
Don't I know it.
-Willow and Xander (Nightmares)

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