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Dead Things Quotes
Dead Things Quotes

Buffy: Uh... we missed the bed again.
Spike: Lucky for the bed.
Buffy: Is this a new rug?
Spike: Mm... no. Just looks different when you're under it.
Buffy: You know, this place is okay for a hole in the ground. You fixed it up.
Spike: Well, I ate a decorator once. Maybe something stuck.
Buffy: I've been thinking about doing something to my room.
Spike: Yeah?
Buffy: Yeah, I think the New Kids On The Block posters are starting to date me.

Spike: You were amazing.
Buffy: You got the job done yourself.
Spike: I was just trying to keep up. The things you do... the way you make it hurt in all the wrong places. I've never been with such an animal.
Buffy: I'm not an animal.
Spike: You wanna see the bite marks?

Spike: What is this to you? This thing we have.
Buffy: We don't have a... thing, we have... this. That's all.
Spike: Do you even like me?
Buffy: Sometimes.
Spike: But you like what I do to you. Do you trust me?
Buffy: Never.

Buffy: I-it's Spike. He can hurt me. Without his head exploding.
Tara: Oh my god. Hi-his chip stopped working?
Buffy: No, it still works. Just not on me. I-I need to know about the spell. The one that... brought me back. I, I'd ask Willow, but...
Tara: You think it's you.
Buffy: I don't know. I feel... different. There are things... I-I think... maybe... I came back wrong.
Tara: No, Buffy, that's n-not ... no. You didn't.
Buffy: Can you check out the spell? Just see if there's something that... Could you just check? Please?

Andrew: We can really have anyone we want.
Jonathan: It's like candy.
Andrew: Juicy, pulsating candy.
Jonathan: Oh! Oh, the one with the neck! Put the whammy on the neck!
Andrew: No! The redhead! I want the redhead!
Jonathan: The redhead's too tall.
Andrew: So get a step ladder. No, no, ow!

Andrew: Oh, she's kinda cute -- Ow! Oh, no, go for the leather skirt! Oh, bazoombas! Go for the one with the bazoombas!
Jonathan: Yeah, go for the one with the bazoombas.

Jonathan: I really could've used one of these in high school.
Warren: Gentlemen? To crime.
Andrew/Jonathan: Crime!
Andrew: Crime tastes funny.

Warren: I just, I wanted us to be together!
Katrina: There is no us, Warren! Get that through your big meaty head! I am not your girlfriend anymore!
Jonathan: She's your ex?
Andrew: Dude, that is messed up.
Katrina: Oh, you think? You bunch of little boys, playing at being men. Well, this is not some fantasy, it's not a game, you freaks! It's rape!
Jonathan: What?
Andrew: No... we didn't-
Katrina: You're all sick. And I'm going to make sure you get locked up for this. And then we'll see how you like getting raped.

Xander: Oh! I think I pulled a jive muscle last night.
Willow: The Funky Monkey claims another victim.

Spike: You are not throwing your life away over this.
Buffy: It's not your choice.
Spike: Why are you doing this to yourself?
Buffy: A girl is dead because of me.
Spike: And how many people are alive because of you? How many have you saved? One dead girl doesn't tip the scale.
Buffy: That's all it is to you, isn't it? Just another body!
Spike: Buffy-
Buffy: can't understand why this is killing me, can you?
Spike: Why don't you explain it? Come on, that's it, put it on me. Put it all on me. That's my girl.
Buffy: I am not your girl! You don't... have a soul! There is nothing good or clean in you. You are dead inside! You can't feel anything real! I could never... be your girl!
Spike: You always hurt... the one you love, pet.

Anya: Mm. The Rwasundi. Very rare. Um, its presence in our dimension causes a sort of... localized temporal disturbance.
Buffy: So that's why time went all David Lynch?
Anya: Right. Uh, human perception is based on a linear chronology. Being exposed to the Rwasundi for more than a few seconds can cause, uh, vivid hallucinations. And a slight tingly scalp.
Willow: So that's it. These things just made you think you killed her.
Xander: She was probably dead long before you stumbled across her.
Buffy: It wasn't the demons. It was Warren. He knew Katrina. He had something to do with it, I know it.
Willow: How can you be sure?
Buffy: You always hurt the one you love.

Warren: The coroner's ruling it a suicide.
Jonathan: What about Buffy?
Warren: Well, it wasn't that hard messing her game up. If she figures it out... we'll take care of her.
Andrew: We really got away with murder. That's... kinda cool.
Jonathan: Yeah. Cool.

Tara: I-I've double checked everything. There's nothing wrong with you.
Buffy: Then why can Spike hurt me?
Tara: Well, I said that there was nothing wrong with you, but... you are different. Shifting you out of... f-f-from where you were... funneling your essence back into your body... i-it, it altered you on a basic molecular level. Probably just enough to confuse the sensors or whatever in Spike's chip. But it's all just surfacey physical stuff. It wouldn't have any more effect than... a bad sunburn.
Buffy: I didn't come back wrong?
Tara: No, you're the same Buffy. With a deep tropical cellular tan.
Buffy: You must have missed something. Will you check again?
Tara: Buffy, I-I promise, there's nothing wrong with you.
Buffy: There has to be! This just can't be me, it isn't me. Why do I feel like this? Why do I let Spike do those things to me?
Tara: You mean hit you. Oh. Oh, huh. Really.
Buffy: He's everything I hate. He's everything that... I'm supposed to be against. But the only time that I ever feel anything is when... Don't tell anyone, please.
Tara: I won't.
Buffy: The way they would look at me... I just couldn't...
Tara: I won't tell anyone. I wouldn't do that.
Buffy: Why can't I stop? Why do I keep letting him in?
Tara: Do you love him? I-It's okay if you do. He's done a lot of good, and, and he does love you. A-and Buffy, it's okay if you don't. You're going through a really hard time, and you're...
Buffy: What? Using him? What's okay about that?
Tara: It's not that simple.
Buffy: It is! It's wrong. I'm wrong. Tell me that I'm wrong, please... Please don't forgive me, please... Please don't... Please don't forgive me...

The Usual
The Usual

Random Quotage:

So, Buffy, how'd the slaying go last night?
I mean, how'd the laying go? No, I don't mean that either.
-Xander and Buffy (Never Kill a Boy on the First Date)

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